After having a baby we have just made a huge transformation the mind, body and spirit have literally been tawn apart!
When I started writing this post I thought about why I am writing it. Is it for likes or is it to let women who after having a baby are feeling really crap about their body, feel better and give themselves a break? It’s safe to say the latter. That’s my mission in all my work. I created my platform for women to love themselves a little more by sharing my vulnerability which is pretty scary, we love sharing our best bits, don’t we?!? I was going to wait until I’ve completed my twelves week program to post pics but this morning taking the photos I decided I wanted to show women postpartum that’s it’s ok to be wobbly, to have days where you want to drink wine and eat cheese as long as you have a goal, destination your headed and you’re doing it for the right reasons. Fuck keeping up with the jones or to look better than someone else.
I am really pleased with how my postpartum journey is going. As someone who suffers from body dysmorphia (always thinking I look bigger than I am.) I knew that I needed to go to a place of self-love after having my daughter, as women we are under so much pressure to look a certain way with conditioning from the media on how we should look to feel sexy and over the years I was sucked in hook line and sinker.
In the past, I dieted from a place of self-loathing and I now look back at how lovely my figure was and I was never happy, comparing myself to other women often ones that didn’t have children or edited pictures on the internet. I’ve definitely still had days where I have felt low self-esteem and giving myself a hard time to ‘spring back’ but I now have learned some tools to be kinder to myself. We don’t go back, our body has changed each time we have a baby, we are different, we are a mother.
Over the past 2.5 years, my body has been on a huge journey with one ectopic pregnancy losing one fallopian tube, reducing our chances of getting pregnant to falling pregnant again a few short months later carrying the baby to my twelve-week scan to find out we had a missed miscarriage. My body has been through so much I started to learn about my cycles and how to listen to it when to rest when to be creative, energetic in line with my cycle. As women our body goes through seasons each month releasing eggs which is why we have mood swings in the patriotic system we have come to know, we are taught to plug up our period and get on with it, women of ancient history knew to relax and treat our body gently on these days.
Once I started to listen to my body intuitively that’s when I started to treat her like my vessel which holds the soul inside, talk to her like I would my best friend or daughter. When I catch myself giving my body a hard time, I decide to be gentler, kinder and eat food to enrich it. My craving during my pregnancy was cheese and dairy and I indulged. I continued yoga up to 37 weeks and listened to my body which was telling me to rest.
After Arabella was born I had postnatal care included with my package hiring a doula which was fantastic on my emotional days I could talk through where my heads at, I had a weekly massage on my hips and belly a treatment called Closing of the bones which has also helped me heal my uterus closing in a healthy way. I don’t think there is enough information available to women regarding the fourth trimester and self-care after having a baby in England, I was never told to stay with my feet up for at least two weeks preferably the first four weeks. It was never mentioned by midwives or the hospital. it was only through my doula Kim! After having Arabella I wanted to go out do things but a few times I overdid it and felt terrible, heavy and ached all over, this is the body’s way of telling you to slow down and I listened instead of trying to ignore it which is why so many women have incontinence and bowel problems further down the line, the middle-age spread and many more problems which occur many years after in most cases.
The first six weeks of having Arabella I enjoyed bonding with my baby with my feet up. Once the six weeks were up and I had my postnatal check, I started doing some gentle postnatal yoga. I signed up to a program taught by Casey Bachalor called Yoga Blitz. It had a seven days trial for free and it includes a balanced eating program with lots of meal ideas the pictures used for this blog post are taken three weeks apart, this is four days of 15-minute yoga on the postnatal plan the meal options are really tasty and easy to cook which is all perfect with a newborn baby! On the plan there is an option for a protein shake, In the morning I’ve been using vanilla Juice Plus which is a plant-based protein (good for breastfeeding mothers) on at least four days and I’ve been loving experimenting making different shakes or porridge which only take a few minutes prep and can have on the go. I’ve really noticed my body feeling stronger in that short time and have now re-joined the gym and have felt up to doing low impact cardio which has also been fantastic giving me a burst of dopamine and serotonin the happy hormones, plus a little time for me. I also found a friend to buddy up with to do the plan to check in each week keeping it fun and me motivated!
Before having my baby I had a routine for meditation in the mornings mentioned in previous blogs called my magic mornings, this has had to adjust now. I fit meditation in when my baby is sleeping, I’ve definitely noticed that my mind is a lot louder and I find it difficult to shut off. I let the thoughts come and then re-centre the body. I use breath work, some heart math or 7/11 breathing both found in my free community group HERE
- Throw away the scales
Think about how you feel in your body and clothes. With weighing yourself you can get caught up in punishing your body and stressed if you don’t lose any. Putting a strain on your self-esteem often leading to giving up with healthy living or yo-yo dieting.
- A balanced meal plan
Use a 80/20 rule for healthy eating and treats. Go for something you know you will enjoy and has longevity making small changes.
- plan out your week
Work your food around what you are doing if you know you are going out allow yourself to eat a treat that day. Preparation will ensure that you stay on a healthy eating plan which sticks long term.
- Listen to your inner dialogue
How are you talking to yourself? Are you being kind? After having a baby we can be really hard on ourselves, give yourself a break. Try imagining someone saying those things to your baby and change the thoughts to how you would want your baby to feel about themselves.
- Do what you can
This ones for if you’ve just had a baby, are a mother or have no children at all! Do what you can we don’t feel like meditating, going to the gym, eating well every day so if you have a bad day and fall off plan start again tomorrow!
I love sharing my journey with you, I really hope it helps you with your postnatal journey.
Love and Light,